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Why is trusting so hard?


You know, it seems like trusting is soooo hard! Others may have a much easier time at it. I’m sure there are some that just have this overarching, yet penetrating sense that no matter what, God will protect, provide and shelter them regardless of what ever trials they may face. And, those people, simple, and childlike in their faith are truly blessed because they shall enter the kingdom of God.
I, am slightly ashamed to say that lately, it doesn’t feel as if I have been in that state of mind as much as I should. Even just saying that though, I realize that I am my own most severe critic, and I must be carefull to objectively identify faults and sins in my life and yet see them throuh the redemptive and purifying qualities of Jesus’ blood.
Though I, many times, am not living in the fullness of the freedom that “the Kingdom of God” offers, God the Father looks down upon me with delight and pleasure. The reason is because He has hidden me in His Son Jesus. It is in that place that my strength is found and I did nothing to get my self in! It was only His hand that could usher me into this fortress of grace that the cross has constructed, and no other hand can remove me from there.
Since I am so secure, I can be honest about those times when I find myself questioning. Whether I am questioning about whether or not God is going to provide for our apartment, or if it’s about provision for the time after Hyderabad, or even just about if we have enough to get what we need to now, I know that it’s ok with Him. He doesn’t want me to doubt, and the scriptures are clear that doubting leads to no fruitful thing. Yet His grace is sufficient for me in my time of weakness. And, this grace is there to help me believe.
Even as I write these things about my own weakness and His strength in the midst of it, I feel my own faith arise. I am reminded of the faithfulness of His character and His undying love. I am reminded of the lengths that He travailed to ensure that I can be found secure in His arms and I am reminded that He will not let me go. My faith is strengthened and I know that He will also provide.
So, what is my point? I guess it’s just that the cross is central. His grace, divied out on Golgotha has what it takes to ensure me of my security in all areas of my life. If I can believe in His love there, than I can apply that love to all situations.
Thank you Lord for loving me, dying for me, and ressurecting your Son, Jesus to sit at your right hand and intercede for me, even now. I pray that you would enlighten the eyes of my friends and family reading this, and those that aren’t, to know the strength and power of the grace you have provided for those who will receive it!

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